Sunday, July 10, 2011

The Blessing

Tenovice is definitely my favorite retreat center. Many of us travelers feel the same. It is smaller than the other places, and every area is visible from the others, it gives a sense of closeness, of cozyness that makes the feeling of being home even stronger.

People are extremely joyful, the weather is good, in spite of some rain and cold nights. We are all in joyful spirits. The Phowa course is the most powerful I've ever attended. People burst out laughing at every meditation and Lama Ole laughs gently and says "Dewachen is a happy place" We can't stop smiling.

After so many courses I finally have come to know many people and to make some friends, it is no longer a matter of eating alone, I always find someone to share my time with, and Carina and myself are growing closer. Maja is also here with her delicious sense of humour. I tease her because she always finds a "kissing boyfriend" she has to go say hello to. Tenovice will also be remembered by the amount of gorgeous men present!!! The czech are really making a good impression, but not only the czech, it would seem like all the good looking men in the Dharma have made it here and we can't help smiling from the "view" :) Antonia likes short and chubby guys, I like tall skinny guys, Carina is more of the athletic tall kind, and Maja, well Maja simply likes them all!!! 

There are more than 2700 people here, and like I said everyone is happy. When not meditating I spend my time lounging in the sun, greeting friends, meeting cute guys that come to talk to me and wonder why I am smiling all the time (because I'm happy! Duh!!!). I also am getting to know others better, and I enjoy waiting for Pasha's jokes or finding out who is dating who. We are having a great time. The gompa is bursting with people and there is very little room for newcomers. There is one spot next to me and occasionally someone comes late to the session and sits next to me (I am bordering an aisle) instead of disturbing everyone to get to his cushion. On Thursday I have a surprise: I know this guy!!! It is P., from the Benalmadena bus! I greet him and it's like we're best friends forever, we meditate and in between meditations can't stop talking about this and that, and laugh. Carina is smitten, she finds him beautiful. But he apparently has a thing for me. He brings me juices and takes my picture, and rubs my back, and accidently flutters my hand. I just smile and enjoy it. I have been so sick with longing of affection that I can only think of Amithaba, the blissful red Buddha on top of my head who grants all wishes, and I wonder.

All along the course I have been experiencing  the desire for some tenderness and have been focusing on making wishes for all my friends, wishing them love and happiness. And it is only natural that now someone comes to give me kindness, attention and tenderness. He finds me kind and joyful, and loves my hair that he finds soft. Although he is not really my type, I am grateful for this. I can only make more wishes, may all beings have someone to love and to love them in return, may all beings feel the joy I feel this week, may all beings receive the blessing of the Dharma, may all beings reach Enlightment.

The last day another good sign appears: I fall sick, a strong purification takes place and I have a fever. I am sad that I cannot attend the traditional last day Party, but I only want to sleep the fever off. Before leaving, I go to Lama Ole for a parting blessing, he recognizes me and asks me how I find Europe. I tell him directly "I love this country, I'm thinking of moving here" And he readily agrees, he finds this to be a great idea and he blesses me. That is all I needed. All the signs are here. 

My decision is made. I will live here. I have The Blessing. 

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